Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Hiatus

I'm taking a little blogging hiatus.

My mom's gas furnace stopped working last week, filling her house with smoke. Nothing was actually on fire, but she handled the situation poorly. It could have been very dangerous. She stayed with us for a few days while it was mostly fixed, but the whole process revealed new problems with her living alone. We need to dramatically speed up the process of moving her in with us, which will be challenging for everyone.

Right now, the kids take turns sleeping on the floor while she sleeps in their beds. We may be moving - very soon - at a larger rented house. Her house has 4BR, but is in no way ready for anyone to move into it, even with all the elbow grease we could bring to bear. It's not a solution to the immediate problem.

Our current house is so small that we don't have room for a sofa - we have two armchairs and the kids sit on the floor when we all watch a movie. We literally did not have room to add another adult. The single bathroom is a considerable choke point - we seriously need another half bath. All that makes mom feel even more like she is a burden -which we are trying to combat. The feeling that she is a burden or an interruption is one of the things that makes her fail to ask us for help when she absolutely needs to do so. She is actually harder to help because she waits too long to get help with things we could quickly solve.

I will be back soon, maybe just a week or two, maybe longer. I'll try to keep reading most of my Indy blog roll, but I probably won't comment much. I'll keep some notes, so I can return with a big fat Independence Days Challenge Report.

I'll miss you guys!

16 comments:

LisaZ said...

Good luck with everything, Matriarchy. I'll be thinking of you?

And what is that makes old ladies so stubborn these days? I really hope we are not like that when we're old! (Not to pick on your mom. My 90yo Grandma is the same way, and I just don't get it all the time. They would let their health suffer just for their stubbornness!) Sorry to rant...

fullfreezer said...

Oh Dear! Please make sure you are taking care of yourself through all of this. There's nothing like a crisis situation to have a lot of us running ourselves into the ground until we're not good for anyone (been there- done that)
I worry about my parents as well. My Dad will turn 86 in a few weeks and my Mom is 80. They are slowing down but are still out cutting firewood (eek!). They are an hour drive away from here. My sisters are out of state and my brother is rarely in the country anymore so guess who will probably end up helping out when they need it.
Hang in there, I'll be sending good thoughts your way.
Judy

Krista said...

Good luck with your mom. I hope you get the situation worked out soon!

Michelle said...

Have you called your Mom's insurance company? My folks had something similar happen with their oil furnace (spewed vaporized oil into the house instead of heat) and the insurance company not only paid for the cleanup, they SENT the cleanup crew. Worth a call....

Matriarchy said...

In my mom's case, we cannot have anyone see the inside of her house. She is a compulsive hoarder - an insurance agent would have a heart attack. He made the gas man use the back door - although I am sure he has seen houses just a bad, and was not fooled in the least.

I think this is just going to be "the event" that ends her living alone. We know it would be something, and we are fortunate that it was not a fall or an illness. In a way, it lets us move forward, instead of waiting and coaxing her to do this or that.

livinginalocalzone said...

Please, of course do all you need to in order to take care of yourself and your family! That's a lot to have on your plate. I hope all goes well for you.

Marie said...

I sympthize. My own mother is 87. She lives in an appartment 5 minutes from our house. We do the cleaning, shopping and laundry.

It's good to have her so close. She is an independent woman used to taking care of everything herself. I hope she has many more years of living independently.

I'll miss you. I know you will work through this successfully.

Best wishes.

Gina said...

Will be thinking of you!

It is sometimes good to take a hiatus and get your life in focus (I know this from my own experience, of course!! :)

Will miss your detailed posts!

MeadowLark said...

Good luck with all of this. I'll be watching the feed reader to see your return.

twofroghome.com said...

Take care and give us status updates now and then won't ya?

lauralynne said...

Oh, I'm wishing you much luck. I also hope that you are able to take time to mentally refresh and recharge, even if it is only for 15-20 minutes. Taking care of family is HARD!

RazorFamilyFarms.com said...

I just took another blogging hiatus (my first one was in December when the children first arrived). Take all the time you need. Isn't the blogging community wonderful? I feel so very blessed to be part of such a warm and loving group!

I hope that your mother is feeling better and that things go well with the move. Bless your heart!

In friendship,
Lacy

Kathy said...

You might find this blog of interest:
http://www.genbetween.com/

Verde said...

Do you have an update?

Robbyn said...

Our thoughts will be with you! :)

Kathy said...

Congratulations! you won the Botanical Interests seeds at my giveaway: http://www.coldclimategardening.com/2009/02/06/the-winner-of-the-botanical-interests-seed-giveaway-is/

I sent you an email with details on how to claim your seeds. Wishing you the best, Kathy